I have been having a serious case of writer’s block lately, which explains the dearth of recovery-oriented essays on this blog. I’m still in treatment, though I’ve been stepped down to their partial hospitalization program (PHP). I’m living in an apartment with two other women from the Creek, and next week I get to start making my own dinners, so I’ll have some recipes to share.
I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want to do when I leave treatment. It’s recommended that I find an IOP program, which is what I’ll probably end up doing. I’m not too excited about potentially spending another four to six months in IOP like I did last time. But I also know that when I signed myself out of IOP last year, I was feeling similarly fed up with treatment and ended up in relapse, so I guess I’d better stick with it.
While I’m back home in IOP, I want to find a new job that doesn’t involve food. I currently work as a cashier in a grocery store, and it’s an alright job, but I’d like to do something else. I’m going to apply at the three newspapers in my town and see if I could actually be paid for my writing. I’m hoping that I’ll be done with IOP before next fall when I go back to Eckerd, because what I really dream of doing is WWOOFing. WWOOF, or WorldWide Opportunities on Organic Farms is a program where volunteer work is exchanged for room and board. I read Anna McConnell‘s essay for Rookie about her time on communes during my junior or senior year of high school and fell in love with the idea. My parents are hesitant but supportive, and there are a lot of farms in Florida, so I wouldn’t be too far from home. This is something I feel passionate about, and I’ve already started emailing farms in my area. I have a year off from college, something I really wanted before I started applying, and I want to make the most of it. I want to recover and get better, but I also want to have an adventure.